# Inviernopasara!

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Neuen Zeiten: Баллада о трудовых навыках. A local bar was so sure that its barman was the strongest man in the Village that they offered a standing £1000 bet. The barman would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran out and challenge any man to squeeze out another drop. Weightlifters, arm wrestlers, they all tried and lost the bet. Then one day, a scrawny little man, (if he stood sideways you would not see him) wearing scratched glasses, a ten-year-old polyester suit, walked in and said,

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Neuen Zeiten: Лучше скажи мало, но хорошо. It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same villages and towns. When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a gift cheque for £50. At the second house they presented him an 18-carat gold watch. The folks at the third house handed him a bottle of 15-year old S

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Neuen Zeiten: К вопросу о свободном ношении оружия. A young boy goes off to college. Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all his money .... He calls home. "Dad" he says, "You won't believe what modern education is developing ! They actually have a program here in our institution that will teach our dog, Jack, how to talk !" "That's amazing,"his father says. "How do I get Jack in that program ?" "Just send him down here with $10,000" the young boy says " and I'll get hi

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